Saturday, April 16, 2005

Lizard Men found living in Downtown Shanty Towns

It may be scary at first glance, but the Lizard Men have the decency to wear a unitard, so maybe we should treat them as equals.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Worm Men spotted in the Foothills!

Officials have made an official announcement...


There have been several sightings of Worm Men, mostly near streams and creeks in the local foothills. They have a voracious appetite for meat as indicated by several deer carcasses found near their underground burrows. So far there have been no reports of attacks on humans, however local police are investigating recent missing person reports.

Friday, April 08, 2005

Vegas Used Car Dealer sells UFOs too!

Las Vegas Used car salesman, Jerry Pippen, has a great deal on a low mileage single seater UFO. Jerry tells The Atomic Eye that this rare find was owned by a little old alien lady from the M945 galaxy, and it's a real cream puff. So come on down... this weekend Jerry has free balloons and Moon Rocks for the kids!

Monday, April 04, 2005

Big Time Jiffy Pop in Roswell

The Roswell UFO Crash was really just a large "Jiffy Pop" popcorn product, officials said.

Friday, April 01, 2005

Skeleton Boy found in Tar Pit may be from the future.

NEW CiRClar SCANNING RADAR shows, 200,000 year old skeleton has 5 previously uncharted genomes, not currently found in today's humans. Scientists from Johns Hopkins say that the skeleton may actually not have actually been born yet, speculating, "What if it's from the future?"

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